I recently had to go to a meeting which I did NOT want to go to AT ALL. I added stress upon stress thinking and imagining all the things that have been said in similar meetings and caused myself a stress migraine. Lame.
I don’t know if you do this but I talk to myself. Not all the time out loud, but yeah. So I began to tell myself that you’ve got to power up (not those words but basically) and go into that meeting with huge walls around myself so that the failure feelings of the past wouldn’t wound me this time.
All of a sudden God gave me two pictures. I could go into the meeting alone with an inflatable suit on that gave me huge muscles and made me walk like I was tough. I had this picture of myself walking into the meeting facing my opponents. Ready for their comments. And also looking ridiculous. However, I then received a picture of myself on the back of Jesus going into the meeting. I was like one of those teeny cute baby monkeys that cling to their mothers backs. That the strength walking into the meeting shouldn’t be my own (imaginary) strength but actually God’s. I found this incredibly reassuring and like I didn’t have to put any pressure on myself. Just knowing that He was walking in first and would take the bulk of what would be said was relieving to say the least.
If you find yourself in a situation that you would automatically gear up for, pump yourself up or create defensive walls around yourself for protection just know that there is such a better way. It’s not up to you or me.
Matthew 11:28 MSG
“Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”
Also, the meeting went better than I thought! I left without feeling attacked or incredibly discouraged. Instead I could see that there was clear communication and possible steps to be taken in the future. A partnership in a sense. So progress! 🙂
